Day Two In my Course on Loving Relationships
Not nearly as interesting as Day One's lesson. Here's today's: We unconsciously choose people we have something in common with. As is common emotional health. "Like attracts Like".
O.K. I get that. So?
Today's lesson focuses on primary partnerships. I get that, but feel a bit ticked off. Please, let's get to platonic love! With our own gender! What is it with me? I love men, but I'm here to learn about friendship. With my own gender. Where's the confidence? It's like I have this prejudice about women. Like we're the version of humanity called 'men lite'.
Women as 'Men lite'. I'd love to hear your thoughts about THAT.
In the meantime, I'm cooking up a wonderful recipe I learned from Judy at www.judeself.blogspot.com . Something called Kraut Brot, cabbage and ground beef mixture tucked into a bread pocket. Only I'm not doing the bread pocket part. And I'm going to experiment - add sauerkraut to a small portion. Off now, to eat!
Good evening.
Eat well
Love well
Sweet dreams!
Men lite? that's a new one.
ReplyDeleteFrom early childhood I think we learn that we are in competition with those in our own gender in a different way than with the opposite sex. Much of that could change as the differences between gender occupations, sports participation, opportunities, etc blurs and we start looking at men as competitors, too. But for our generation we compete for the attention of our parents, teachers and the opposite sex which makes us less trusting of other women....in my opinion. Hey, we even compete with our own mothers for our father's attention when we are very young. I have never in my life looked at another woman as a partner or a confident like I have with men. Jeez, maybe I need your course, too!
I don't want love from other women, I want friendship, warmth, a pal with like interests.
So you experience this 'built in' attitude toward women, too!?! I am kind of shocked to learn I devalue my very own gender for some needs. Explains a lot LOL. I am quite aware that the woman teaching this course has no such bias, but - geez - look at this terminology -"Primary" relationship. Where does this leave friendship - as secondary? The booby prize? I hear for some wives, sharing from their heart is reserved for their women friends, not their husbands. It wasn't that way at all for me. I cannot fathom keeping any emotional distance from the man I love.
DeleteI've heart that from women, too, that they don't share their heart/secrets/hopes/dreams with their spouses, it's like they are just partners who raise a family together. That's not my idea of a marriage either.
DeleteI find it easier to have relationships NOW with men than any other time in my life. We are sort of genderless. We have no Estrogen left and they have no Testosterone. Relationships seem so much easier when sex is not involved.
ReplyDeleteI hear you. I believe you, and my older women friends feel this way, too. Even if they have had a sparkling sex life under Christmas trees. LOL. I know for myself that my sex locator beacon has not shut off. I thought it had, but then someone last fall sparked me, and before I knew it I was flirting. I shut it off, but not before- oops!- blowing him a kiss. (He is grieving a failed marriage and not my cup of tea anyway.)
ReplyDelete