Friday, January 30, 2015

Where I'd Rather Be

This is one of the diners where I eat breakfast. It's also where I'd rather be headed this morning.

Today, instead, I'm going out to a godawfully early breakfast downtown at one of our highrise hotels with about 250 others.. I hate these breakfasts!  I know that's the kid in me talking, and I am trying my best to keep an open mind.  I ignored today's invitation three times.  But the inviter persisted, sending me a little Christmas ornament with her invitation.  Mid January, I finally called and accepted.

Lest you think I'm rude, I am.  I did not want to go and how do you call and say no thank you?  I practiced declining, practiced saying I'm just not going to be good company, and all.   When I called, finally, I ended up saying yes.  Today's the day!

It's one of those hoopla events Charities host.  They keep us in the loop, I suppose, telling us about all their meaningful efforts enabled by our donations.  Today this charity will honor the good men and women who have given their compassion and their time in 2014.  There will be clapping.  There will be schmoozing.  Hopefully not too much, for it's a breakfast, and folks have to get to work.  Neither my late hubby nor I liked these events and we'd take pains to dodge invitations. Pretty successfully.  After he died, the donations and the invitations continued.  I went to a few of these functions, by myself, socializing with a smile and a drink in my hand.  God, I was incredibly relieved when I could head back to my car, and simply be - me.  Quiet, unedited.   I stopped going.

In a perfect world, I'd wash my hair, but it's too late for that.

I scheduled two things afterwards.  My morning should end satisfactorily!

   Good morning 

Wishing you warmth 




  1. And that leads to the question: can we be our authentic selves if we continue doing things we don't want to do just because it's easier than saying, "Please take me off your mailing list?" Hope you had a better time than you predicted.

    1. Such a great question. I have two, maybe more, authentic selves? The authentic chicken, the authentic adventurer, the authentic kind person? I guess the authentic kind person accepted the invitation? As it turned out, I was moved to tears by the stories of people helping others, and that's always a good thing: -)

  2. This just sounds so wonderfully, excitingly...UGH!
    You're still young Flo and feel you "have" to do these things.
    In a few years, you will get to the point where you only do what YOU really want to do and feel absolutely no guilt about refusing their invitations.

    1. I'm partway there, Judy! Tell you what. You draw a boundary with Dar and I'll draw a boundary with these folks. Deal?