My list of reasons to let go.
- Our late husbands' love is encoded in our DNA and can never to be lost
- Fulfillment is ours to access inside, not for someone to give us or take away
- God's larger love story for us is being written
- We can mature in ways we didn't have to when our late husbands offered us shelter
- We inhabit our own psyches fully, now that he's not around to inhabit them
- Living without his second opinion is fine because our own and God's is ample
- The fear "But I'm alone" can't stop us from traveling, or stepping out to have a good time
- We have more sex with the person who gets all our hot spots, every time - us!
- We blow our own minds when we realize how powerful we've become on our own
- We blow other wives' minds when they learn all we've been doing
The past isn't firm ground. It has vanished. I feel shaky. The present is shifting under my feet constantly, yet I trust there's solid rock underneath. This rock is God and the 'me' beneath all my shifting identities. 'Wife' is gone. My husband's eyes don't mirror mine anymore. 'Widow' is a but a passage, and cold comfort.
God remains. The sky remains. The water, the earth and all their inhabitants remain. And their eyes mirror my intention and deepest self. What message am I sending out? Love? Gratitude? Anticipation? I need to be held accountable.
What benefits have you found in letting go of your late husband and the life you once had?