Wednesday, June 6, 2012
It's a beautiful day
I just can't see it.
I saw a dead deer by the side of the road, and an official town truck stopped alongside. Two men in their fluorescent orange vests had wrapped a towel around her and were about to heave her into the bed of the truck. "That could be me!" I wailed.
Life gets bleak when I look ahead, if it's love I'm looking for.
I finished the bike ride for our local cancer center. 53 miles in under 4 hours. 3649 feet ascending and 3649 feet descending. Slower than the racers half my age, but faster than I rode it two years ago. Fast down some hills - 35 mph - and la dee da slow up some hills - 5 mph. I was easily the oldest woman cycling the route. I did feel tired afterward, but I didn't feel sore, not even the tiniest little bit.
Five years ago I couldn't have done this. I was out of shape and grieving. I weighed 149 and wore size 12. Then I saw someone cycling in the mountains of Tuscany. What freedom! What gorgeous landscape! What vitality! I want that! So with that in mind, I put myself on a weight training regimen. When I wanted to quit I held out my carrot - that cyclist in Tuscany was me. I bought a bicycle and bribed myself to go 4 1/2 miles. Then more. Then more. I found an auction site offering a discount bike trip for two to Tuscany, and I bid my birth year. Wouldn't you know, I won? Guess I was meant to go.
That was five years ago. I need to believe I can see a beautiful day, today.