Wednesday, February 13, 2013

What am I to do?

I'm torn, confused about my future with a man I love.  Here I sit, talking to myself.   Can you help? 

"Dear self. Be happy.  This is just a fancy way of saying..."

"What do I want to do with the days I have left?"

"Envision life is supporting your happiness".   

"Support for my happiness?" 

"You have a little say in this, you know." 

"Look, I'm happy if the sky isn't falling in. "
"Widowhood happens. You actually have it a lot better than most widows. You got to say good bye." 
"Look in the mirror."
~ ~ ~P ~E ~S ~S ~I ~M ~I ~S ~T ~ ~ ~ 

"Wow.  This post sure is a downer."  
"Life is what happens to you whether you believe in it or not."

"Will life bring me happiness?

"Do you need it to?"

"More than ever."
"Dare to be an optimist."

"But I had this experience."
"Chicken Little"
 "....The sky is not falling?"
"I'm sure I can find a fox who agrees it is."
"Be happy."
 "And when the does sky fall in?"
"Add another acorn to your collection."
 "Look , wise guy.  If an acorn falls far and fast enough it can kill you.  That's what losing a spouse is like."
"Did it?"
"Yes.  It killed part of me."
"Then don't sit under an acorn tree." 
Link to the story of Chicken Little:


  1. Life is for the living. We have to make up our minds if we want to wallow in yesterday's memories or make new ones today and tomorrow. Not an easy decision as your post clearly exhibits.

  2. Thanks for commenting, Jean. Yes, I want to make new memories today and tomorrow. I want to be connected to this good man.

    Getting philosophical, life has been a series of new 'normals'. Some felt natural to grow toward. Some new 'normals' were acquired through serendipity and necessity. For each new 'normal' I accepted and grew into, life opened up in new ways.

    I have picked up scars along the way. Fears, disabilities, limitations. I just don't want any of these scars to be self imposed.

  3. I personally think you're going to be fine and I'm happy for you. You took your time to get to know you as an individual (not half of a whole) and that was important. You opened your heart to new possibilities and what a blessing that is to have found love a second time when you least expected it.

  4. O.K. I'm going to borrow your confidence and try it out. Your observation helps me so much. Thank you.